There are really many saying that state that we aren’t capable of changing people.. An old dog cannot learn new tricks, says one; a zebra cannot change its stripes, says another. But one saying does go, “There is nothing more permanent than change.” How could you reconcile the fact that you can still change no matter how old you are?
Does this imply that there are actually ways for people to mend their ways? Luckily, there’s hope for you to be able to change people and motivate these people to do better. Here are a few tips that you can take into account when you would like to handle the amazing task of motivating someone to change. -
An adage goes, “Acceptance comes before change,” and this is absolutely true regardless of the occasion or thing you’d like to change.. You cannot simply go smashing and hurtling and driving headlong into a person’s life, and take action as the groundbreaking whirlwind which will enact change. Change must go slowly, and when it is going too fast, you could expect reversion to occur quickly too. When starting out a friendship, accept a person’s faults first. Just be sure you set the stage for that person to change because he or she wants to, not because you demanded it and that person simply feels it to be an obligation.
- Try some dolphin training. What do trainers carry out to motivate animals to accomplish tricks? They reward animals for a job properly carried out and ignore animals whenever they do something wrong. This is proven to work with people as well. You know the exhilaration when you get that increase after many years of working very hard, that medal after all your hard work in school, that baby after you had labor for many hours. But you also know how hurtful it is to be neglected and shown indifference.
When you’re pleased with somebody’s actions, reward that person with a smile, a compliment, even a treat at a nearby ice cream parlor, if you’re so willing. Yet when that same person behaves badly and you want that person to change, stay away from a confrontation: ignore the person instead, and let that person vent until the dust settles and he or she feels that you’re ignoring him or her. Do it again until you have the results that you want.
- Remain calm. Motivating someone to change won’t happen right away. If you want a person to change quickly, you’re treading into unclear waters. And if that person really does change quickly, you are bound to be heartbroken on 2 fronts: first, that person could easily be changed and swayed to do anything, and you’re stuck with a pushover; and second, that person can quickly return to old times and hurt you again. You should muster up a lot of courage and persistence to have to deal with such people.
- Be gentle. You may be tempted to get upset at a friend for hurting you over and over, and you’ll be tempted to shout and throw a tantrum. You will simply add fire to a flame, and you can risk getting yourself hurt without having any significant changes occurring. Try talking calmly to your friend, and then leave it at that.
- Do not be afraid to walk away. Sometimes, leaving a person to find himself or herself could be a powerful way to motivate a person actually to change for the better.
